Teens Talk about Texting and What Parents/Educators Need to Know About It
Contributed by: BNetSavvy
For “real” answers about why and how kids text, we went to a pro - a teen who’s been texting for years. Jasmine Gregory, 17, discusses her texting habits and offers advice to concerned parents/educators
Q: Tell me about when you first started texting.
A: I got my first wireless phone during the 8th grade (which is considerably late now a days) and probably didn’t start using text messaging on a regular basis until the start of my freshman year.
By the middle of my sophomore year, most of my friends were using text messaging on a regular basis just to keep in touch, sometimes for gossip, or to ask a question about an assignment.
I thought texting was really difficult at first, but the more you do something the easier it becomes and a couple million messages later, I can text over 50 words per minute.
Q: Tell me how your parents have felt about your texting. Have they been supportive or resistant?
A: At first my parents really didn’t understand text messaging. I can recall being at the dinner table once and my phone making this little “ding” sort of a noise and they assumed someone was calling me and then I had to explain to them that it was a text message. They had heard about it but didn’t understand how I could use 12 keys to be the equivalent to 26 letters and then numbers as well.
My mother was always ok with my text messaging, as long as it didn’t interfere with schoolwork. However, my father has always been a little against technology (especially technology he doesn’t understand) and would sometimes end up frustrated with the non-stop “ding” my phone was making. I think he felt a little disconnected because I could have all these conversations with my friends without saying a word out loud and he wouldn’t have a clue what was being said.
When he would approach me about what I was talking about, of course I would be resistant because when you’re 14 years old the things you are discussing with your friends seem too personal and sometimes embarrassing to discuss with your parents.
I think my parents learned to put themselves in my shoes, step back, and respect my privacy when it came to my text messaging. They trusted me and that I would make the right decisions not to abuse the technology they had provided me with.
Yet, now both my parents are capable of text messaging and I feel it keeps us extremely connected. Being an older teen and having my license, it gives me a fast and easy way to let my family know that I have safely made it to where ever I am going. It also gives me the chance to let them know I’m thinking of them if I’m out of town or out with my friends. I think this is the same with my friends as well, if their parents can text, they also use it as a fast way to stay connected.
Q: What is your preferred tool for texting, and why? What are the texting tool choices out there for tweens/teens, and what do you think people prefer?
A: For me, my preferred tool for texting is a regular wireless phone because I have the keys memorized and can text without looking. Rarely am I just texting, I’m usually doing something else at the same time.
Even though I can type on a normal keyboard about 80-90 words per minute I find it extremely difficult to text on a Blackberry because I have to think a lot more about where each letter is.
For me, it’s all about how fast I can move my fingers and on a Blackberry there are just too many keys. A majority of my friends use and seem to prefer Blackberry’s or devices with full keyboards because those phones have a lot more capabilities. They can check their email, Facebook, My Space, access Instant Messenger, and so much more. It’s all about convenience and accessibility; however, it’s addictive, and these are the teens you never see put their phones down.
To stay connected, most tweens and young teenagers only need a simple wireless phone. I definitely recommend unlimited texting plans so that there are no surprises. I can’t begin to count how many times one of my friends has gone over their texting limit and stuck their family with an additional $200 to their already pricey wireless phone bill.
Q: Can you text from a computer? Can you text TO a computer?
A: Most wireless phone carriers have a link somewhere on their webpage for texting from a computer; however, you have to have a wireless phone with text messaging to respond. My wireless phone is connected to AOL Instant Messenger (AIM) so my Instant Messages (IMs) come to my phone when I’m not signed on. I’m able to respond to these messages and my mom tends to use AIM to text me because it takes a lot less time than doing it manually on her wireless phone.
Q: What’s your favorite thing about texting? What’s the worst thing about texting? Can you think of a time when texting really helped you or a time when it did the opposite?
A: My favorite thing about texting is that I can talk to my friends and family while doing something else. I’m a big-time multitasker and texting definitely helps me in that area. Everyone seems to be in a hurry these days and texting is way for me to stay connected and in little time.
However, the downside to texting is that it gives people the chance to say things that they wouldn’t dare say to someone’s face. I know my best friend was broken up with in a text message because the boy was afraid to say it to her face because he didn’t want to see her cry. Another downside to texting– people can forward a message to someone else and there is no telling whose phone it may end up in and what repercussions may follow.
Q: So is emailing really obsolete for “kids” your age?
A: I do think email is a bit obsolete for kids these days primarily because of instant messaging services. I’ve been using AIM since I was in the 4th grade and the only time I would email my friends is if they weren’t signed on to AIM and I needed to tell them something. Now that we all have wireless phones we can just shoot someone a text with the same information. Another big communication tool for us, especially since we’ve been in high school are social networking sites like My Space and Facebook.
Q: Do you think texting has affected your ability to write well or think clearly?
A: I don’t believe texting has affected my writing abilities because I’ve always loved writing and work hard at writing well, but I know my texting or AIM slang has slipped into my speech before. I’ve found myself saying “I-D-K” for I don’t know or “I-D-C” for I don’t care. I think text/IM slang can easily slip into people’s writing or speech for that matter but most of my peers tend to correct themselves right away.
Q: Should adults — both parents and educators — who are clueless about texting be worried about their kids’/students’ use of it? Why or why not?
A: I don’t believe worried is the word to use here. I think it’s important to be informed. Understanding how text messaging works and how to do it is the first step. I think all parents with a kid who is using text messaging should know how to text. If they don’t understand it, I think most kids are willing to show their parents the basic ropes and if by some chance they aren’t, I’m positive they can find someone else to give them a run-down.
Educators on the other hand, I think it is their job specifically to teach kids proper writing etiquette. Because my teachers showed me what was acceptable and what wasn’t when it comes to writing a paper, I know that I can’t use the things I would in a text message or instant message (i.e., b/c, w/, ttyl, etc.) because it is not proper. I would encourage educators to keep an open mind about text messaging.
Q: Do kids use texting to cheat?
A: I know most kids that want to text during school figure out a way to.
I know of one instance at another high school where a student tried to use texting to cheat but was caught and put to “trial” by the honor council. For teachers, I think it’s important to reinforce before a test that text messaging is not allowed and maybe even urge to students to pull out their wireless phones and turn them off.
Another thing educators could possibly do is encourage parents to talk to their kid about how important it is to have their wireless phone off during school. The smallest things really can make a difference.
Q: Do kids use texting to deceive their parents or to be closer to their parents or both?
A: I can’t think of any instance where kids have used texting specifically to deceive their parents. Text messaging may be one way to mislead but if it’s not texting, it’s probably going to be something else.
Personally, I use text messaging to be closer to my parents. I don’t look at it as being any different than other means of communication. If I’m out of town without them or out with a friend I use text messaging as a quick way to let them know I’m thinking of them, that I’m safe, or something along those lines.
Having parents that are able to text has definitely enhanced my communication with them and I think most of my friends with parents who can text feel the same way. I definitely feel like texting has brought me closer to my father specifically. He was so against it in the beginning but now that he can text, he’s okay with me using it and takes advantage of it as a way to become closer to me.
